Here comes the ?

I've been thinking a lot about marriage lately.  I'm one of the fortune few who have navigated a rocky path and been rewarded with a rich robust satisfying marriage.  It has taken me completely by surprise.  I had thought that there would a separation of ways, a division of assets and a sole path taken by both of us.  We were lucky enough to meet a wonderful woman who, although being picked by random, seemed tailor made to sew back the pieces of our marriage.  She taught us a lot about who we were, how to set expectations and the stupid arrogance we both suffered from.  But that isn't really what I want to chat about.  Yea, I'm sure many are delighted that we are frolicking through the heather, eating strawberries and drinking champagne while listening to an old Carpenters tune but all of this brought a serious issue to mind.  Same sex marriage.

Gay rights has been one that I've been a champion of ever since my first time on the dance floor at "The Transfer" in Santa Monica.  There is something about being surrounded by hot sweaty men, dancing to a disco beat and not once getting inappropriately grabbed. While not always the best for a young woman's self esteem,  it does make a good basis for some life long friendships.  This group of people were my core family when I was living 2000 miles from home.  They celebrated my ups and my downs, my life tragedies and my personal successes.  They cooked for me, cleaned for me and yelled at me when I needed it.  They rescued me from anorexia, bad relationship choices and most importantly, boredom.  The sense of family among many of these couples seemed more real and intense to me than most of my married heterosexual friends.  Why on earth would anyone care if my gay friends got married?  I certainly didn't. Come one come all (or as my brother says "sure, let everyone be miserable...").

And now the irony........some on the conservative christian right use the argument that gay marriage is a threat to heterosexual marriage.  I'm not sure I understand this. If gay marriage is legal, does that mean all of a sudden all the men and women in hetero marriages will leave their partners for members of their own sex?  Are us heteros really as uncommitted to each other that men marrying men and women marrying women will break our bonds of matrimony?  Just don't get it....and the irony I spoke of earlier??? A gay woman saved my heterosexual marriage.  That's right.  My therapist is a lesbian.  Ironic huh?  I hardly think that if she can legally marry,  on our next visit she'll do everything she can to ensure we split up.

So folks, I don't get it.  My thought?  I think its jealousy.....us hetero's know, there is no way that our weddings can match up to our gay brothers and sisters wonderful soiree's that will join them as spouse and spouse.  Bring on the fabulousity!!